It's progress, not perfection...

[BL42]

Elbereth,

The holidays were awkward. After so many years of having a family of my own to celebrate with, it was a very lonely time...I guess all of these feelings are normal during the holidays. It is a hard time for a lot of people, right?

You're not alone. I think it's common for folks in our situations to feeling lonely at the holidays.

I'm not sure if I will use a matchmaker, OLD, or what, but even though I have a lot of fear, there is a part of me that is looking forward to a future with someone.

Lots of OLD discussion, but not much matchmaker talk! Where do you even find one these days?

Honestly, I've tried very hard to avoid all contact with my ex but it seems that every few weeks or so something comes up and he reaches out.

I'm much better when there is no contact at all...no reminders...no seeing his name or hearing his voice.

Honest question...can't you block him? What necessitates contact these days? You don't have young children together.

His family did find out that no one told me that he got married. In fact, when he told them that he was getting married, they told him he needed to tell me. So they thought he had. Needless to say, I think the family thought that was pretty disrespectful of him. I agreed.

You know what was WAY more disrespectful than not telling you he got remarried? Having the affair and divorcing you in the first place. Not even close.

I'm focusing on applying for jobs and exploring new opportunities. I've also made a few new girlfriends. I also have a few more trips planned for this year. After all that I've been through, I'm doing my best to do things that feed my soul and bring me joy.

Sounds good! Keep it up Elbereth!