Divorce immediately after marriage

[BL42]

TellMeSo,

Has anyone had experience were W said that she is feeling psychological pressure?

I received this remark at times when she was mad. I am reconsidering it for myself. Any good ideas how to analyze if I truly put pressure on people and should improve this aspect of my life, or this is only her valid feelings/justification of herself/other reasons?

Thank you.

Psychological pressure is a psychic sensation. In fact, it’s the product of two mental forces that are pulling in opposite directions.-The Four Types of Psychological Pressure(positive,negative,internal,exterior)

After doing a quick search on the term, I would think you can dig into it a little deeper and see if you can make improvements to your behavior.

Also interesting, when I was typing into the search box, one of the suggestions also had "and manipulation" appended on the end.

Yes, you should dig down and if there are issues you need to address certainly do so. However...also don't just blindly believe everything she says. WAS/WSs often blame the LBS for all their problems and can get nasty and accuse the LBS of things that aren't true (or greatly exaggerated) to justify their actions (affairs, divorce...etc.). So self reflect and improve, but also don't let her gaslight you.

After BD my ExW told me she needed to be alone to work on herself and heal because I had beaten her down for 5 years and she was at a "0" because of my mental abuse. She was probably right about the need to work on herself and heal, but not because of me, and also she had no plans to have time alone as this was while she was having an affair with OM1. It caused me to spin because it was so crazy to hear I actually wondered if it were true. But it wasn't. I've dug down and self-reflected and there are things I could've done better but I absolutely did not beat her down to a 0 and be mentally abusive. She also told people ridiculous lies like I don't allow the kids to eat pancakes. WAS/WSs love to place 100% of the blame on the LBS, and tell all their friends and family why they can to leave.

Sometimes I think of that scene from A Few Good Men where Tom Cruise is questioning the doctor on the stand and says: "And that's why it HAD to be, poison, right, Commander? 'Cause Lord knows, if you put a man with a serious coronary condition back on duty with a clean bill of health, and that man died from a heart related incident, you'd have a lot to answer for, wouldn't you, doctor?"

My point is...yes, self reflect and improve certainly, but also don't allow her to lie and gaslight you into thinking you abused her and did something you did not.