Hey, I think I have been ghosted, sort of. After two days, nothing. Odd, as we were starting to walk the dogs together daily.. We we smiling, laughing etc. No sign of anything. I am only trying to figure out the mindset here, not go after her. If she met someone else, quite possible, or she needs space, did I upset her, why not just say it? Being tested? Only she knows, but you all have vast experience here, and letting me grasp how this is playing out is only helpful. Or am I reading too much into it? Regardless, its always good to be educated on how peoples minds work
So you reached out 2 days ago and she never responded?
So you never set the fun date as suggested?
You never went for the kiss?
So yes she could have met someone else though doubtful. She could have decided she doesn’t need another friend. You could have done something to make her decide you are not BF material.
Mach I’m going to be honest with you. You are all over the board. You are not ready to date and you are half a$$ing it anyways.
IMO you should be working on making friends, finding hobbies and self improvement.
What happened to the other two girls you were talking too?
LH, thanks for being straight up. I have no one here, per say I can be frank with. My friends, are in the same neighborhood she lives in, and I really dont want to be frank with them. Gossip etc
So you reached out 2 days ago and she never responded? Correct
So you never set the fun date as suggested? Correct
You never went for the kiss? Correct, as far as full on lips etc
So yes she could have met someone else though doubtful. She could have decided she doesn’t need another friend. You could have done something to make her decide you are not BF material.
Mach I’m going to be honest with you. You are all over the board. You are not ready to date and you are half a$$ing it anyways. Half Arsing the dating with her? Okay
IMO you should be working on making friends, finding hobbies and self improvement. SLowly working it. Been doing more with friends, mostly darts and minor stuff. Grand kids take up allot of time.
What happened to the other two girls you were talking too? One girl I see on weekends, but I am not sure I want to be more than friends, and she works 5/10's during the week. Other girl is out of town, only seen her twice. Lots of potential there. Busy life, like myself.. I am getting ready to leave for 4 to 6 weeks, then a follow on 4 weeks away from here. So, LH, I am a little impatient sometimes. When I was in the service I had to deal with not being confined to a spot for very long. And even back then, which is similar to now, when I met someone, I was a little faster paced than person I met.
You're here now asking for advice on what happened, a post-mortem so to speak, yet you were getting plenty of advice in real time which you kind of ignored, brushed off, or had the attitude you were going at your own pace and knew what you were doing.
Go back and read your last two threads over the last 2.5 months since you met neighbor lady. People recommended: don't spend too much time together initially, don't over pursue, set fun dates, escalate the physical aspect, and stay out of the friend zone...etc.
You were in her house to make dinner and drink two bottles of wine and didn't pursue to the opportunity which means either she wasn't feeling it or you weren't acting confident and gave off friend vibes.
Now you're thinking about her and how she ghosted you and lamenting the loss of a relationship when you two hadn't even kissed (peck on the cheek doesn't count). Instead, fill up your time meeting new friends and new activities. "Darts and minor stuff" doesn't sound too significant. Grand kid time is great, but not exactly getting you out there.
IMO let neighbor lady go for the present. When you come back in 2-3 months if your paths cross then flirt a bit and ask her out on a date with clear intentions to be romantic, not friends.
Me:39 Ex-W:37 M:7 T: 9 S:6 D:3 BD/IHS/Confirm EA/PA: Feb '20 OM1 affair ends: May '20 W/OM2 & moves out: June-July '20 W files for D: Jul20 OM2 confirmed: 9/2020 Divorced: May '21
men think they are competing with the top 10% of men for a woman's affection. But in reality, they are competing against the peace she feels when she's alone.
In other words - you have to be a better option for her than being alone. Sometimes that is a tall order. It may even be why I'm taking so long to get back to dating. Aside from sex (which is important!) a man has to bring enough to the table to be worth the irritations he will likely bring into my life lol.
men think they are competing with the top 10% of men for a woman's affection. But in reality, they are competing against the peace she feels when she's alone.
In other words - you have to be a better option for her than being alone. Sometimes that is a tall order. It may even be why I'm taking so long to get back to dating. Aside from sex (which is important!) a man has to bring enough to the table to be worth the irritations he will likely bring into my life lol.
