Yes, once the divorce is finalized it stirs up some stuff. Seeing the signatures and the now legally binding agreement to dissolve one’s marriage is both relief and grief. Give yourself some time to settle and accept.
Originally Posted by Newborn
I wound up getting a email from our insurance company addressed to him and I just forwarded it to the ex.
For months after my divorce I received letters and calls for XW. Some the business type correspondence like insurance company, dental, etc, rather straightforward and even somewhat expected given for 30 years that address and phone number was her contact info. A few times I shuttled letters meant for XW to her through the kids. I realized I shouldn’t place the kids in that position, so I just returned the letters/bills to the post office to let them deal with it. Even had letters with her new address of OM’s and the post office folks still put them in what was her longtime post office box - now mine. Creatures of habit we are. Lol.
People, friends, would leave messages on the answering machine for XW. Some not aware of the new living arrangements, and some with just no other contact information. Her estranged family had no idea, and the death of her grandfather had her uncle contacting me looking to speak with her. He had no idea we were separated, or where she was living.
Another group provided a strange window into her life - XW’s post BD/D life. She made purchases on various platforms and provided our old contact info. So much old weird stuff she was acquiring. And strange to use our old (now my) home phone number instead of her cell phone number.
Anyhow, dental appointments, surgery confirmations, doctor call backs, people looking for payments, folks confirming purchases, people looking for shipping address, etc.; “I’m sorry, you have the wrong number. She does not live here” quickly became the standard reply. XW and those who interact with her needed to sort things out. Figured, if I remained the easy button, I’d keep getting pressed.
I’m glad you are hopeful of your bright future. It’s been rough road, and yet very much worth it.
D
Feelings are fleeting. Be better, not bitter. Love the person, forgive the sin.
