good.

let her wonder.

keep that up.

also, re: anger --- everyone kept asking me why I wasn't angry during our separation, which was 19 months between BD and D. And I was, I had moments for sure. But over all I felt sadness, compassion, love and definitely owned my side of the street and maybe a little of his too... but man, when the anger came??? Holy $h!t!!!!! It was so deep, so vast, I remember saying to my IC that if I let it out it felt like it would destroy everything around me.

There's a meme going around. You may see it some time. I believe there's a lot of truth to it. This is what it says,

"I sat with Anger for a long time, until She told me her real name was Grief."

File under: Save for later.


M 20+ T25+
S ~15.5 (BD)
BD 4/6/15
D 12/23/16

"Someone I loved once gave me
A box full of darkness.
It took me years to understand,
That this too, was a gift."
~ Mary Oliver