Going dark feels like pressure

[Bat]

Update.
Yesterday he texted me about the fertility test. The whole baby thing is not going to happen. He is very depressed now and realises that it wasn’t even about a child it is about wanting to have a “normal” life. Having the same things what other men have. Being mad at his parents that they didn’t push him to ensure his chances at having kids when it was still possible (before chemo).
Talking about death a lot, how he should have died back then, and that his life is over, better luck next life. He also said something has changed, he can’t watch porn anymore. Something snapped. I hope something will change with OW now, that she not that attractive anymore now there won’t be a baby.

I only listened and validated. Later I sent him a picture of me literally enjoying my picnic. Not to show of I sent him pictures of my food all the time, but the picnic story was in my head when I was eating and I felt good.