Thanks BL, DnJ, bttrfly and DW, I’m out of town on work last two days. Always find it easier to disconnect when away. I am continuing to read and listen to audible non stop. Just finished CoDependent No More, was awesome. Will definitely listen again while out traveling my markets. Just started listening to Love must be Tough. Have finished a couple books as well. I definitely have a good start on my plan for the year to continue to better myself. Like I mentioned I have been struggling a little more with detaching from W, she has been coming downstairs at night to watch TV, hugging and kissing as well as dropping a few ILY. I do not take them as anything just causes confusion in me. I know she is starting to work steps in both of her programs, which gives me hope for her. She has also gotten a little more engaged with S6. I do want the best for her. As for our marriage I am standing for it, but not holding onto Hope. I think God is really trying to show me that I need to learn patience. I give it to him each day and pray for a path to be shown. This weekend we are taking S6 to a show (we bought the tickets before BD) doing an overnight with him. I am torn for him because I know this marriage will most likely not end well and worry about him through all of this. Our 23rd anniversary is coming up at the end of the month as well, so curious as to how I’m going to feel around that time. Anyway, I just needed to get a few things out and appreciate everyone on here.
Bttrfly I read Callis threads, thank you for the recommendations. He demonstrated some great characteristics and I took a lot away from it. Also made me think about my own Sitch and timelines around how ling I want to stand. I see a lot of myself in him. I want to stand for this marriage, this situation is not a good example for my children. I want to stand for this marriage and would like to see what happens after she gets through some of the steps in her programs. I also know that I am going to be fine whether she leaves, or not. Either way I’m going to be a better man and always there for my kids. I’ll know I have all I had on my side by finding, growing and strengthening myself.
Sorry for the ramblings lol, I hate using phone for this
