If it told the story another way, that he found someone else and fell in love, and had to leave me also because I can’t have kids and he wants a family, then people would be supportive to him. Understanding that he wants a child. And if then after let’s say 1-2-3 years he would come back to me, also people would understand and think it’s romantic. But by being honest about it that this outcome is a possible script, then suddenly it’s messed up. I am the one pushing and outing these endless scripts and scenarios. He prefers to just “see what the future will bring”. I just know him and all of his dark thoughts too well. Why I think the most likely scenario is no happily ever after with OW? A) he nevers expressed this, always talks about coming back to me, or staying with her for maybe a year and then move on alone if I don’t want him back or moving on to OW2 b) I know the stress and responsibility of a child is too much for him. He needs her to “pull the wagon” and be mainly responsible for dealing with things like school, financial and social things. I am not able to pull the wagon and that’s why it’s better for the two of us not to have a child. He would love to be a weekend dad, doing mainly the fun things and leave daily responsibility to her. This is not being lazy, there are reasons why we both are not able to do this in a normal way.
How about this? You STOP telling a story and simply present the facts as they are, without embellishment or hypothesizing endlessly about possible outcomes?
M 20+ T25+ S ~15.5 (BD) BD 4/6/15 D 12/23/16
"Someone I loved once gave me A box full of darkness. It took me years to understand, That this too, was a gift." ~ Mary Oliver
