In my defense LH, I'm using women for romance, not sex. A subtle difference, perhaps, but an essential distinction nonetheless. I always tell her that well in advance too. (And BL42, when you say it, look into her eyes and gently caress the air surrounding her hand, almost but not quite touching. Brace yourself for rejection, of course, but know that it comes less frequently than you'd think especially as the years go by and most certainly if you've adopted the air of a flirtatious rake from the outset. If possible, flirt boldly in front of a female audience while utterly ignoring everyone in the room except one woman.)
