Welp

[LH19]

I don’t understand LH. I live a healthy lifestyle. But I am not obsessed with it. I am talking about gym obsessed only protein shake drinking people. I don’t think that’s 75% of the middle aged male population.

I said when you include super fit, unfit, non drinking middle age men in you are talking about 75% of middle age men. 45% obese another 15% unfit that can't keep up but not obese and another 15% who don't drink.

I know this shocks you, but I am a very active and fit woman. I eat healthy generally, and I exercise a lot. I’m not skin and bones, I have lost a decent amount of weight, but my body is strong not tiny. but I have an attractive body shape and am likely more fit than many very skinny women.

I have never said you weren't active or fit.

So I don’t know where you got so black and white, but what is compatible with this does not rule out all men. I’m finding it’s most men around my age, luckily.

I didn't say all I said about 75%.

[Mach40]

I’m also sick of vouyering into others lives.

It's a waster of time anyway because most are a façade. At least the ones I know.

After spending time on the 2D dating sites, I am done looking at them. They are so fake..

Well I was speaking about social media but let's take a closer look.

My spidey senses kept seeing patters of loss of marriage, gain of home, need financial help to maintain lifestyle.

So I have OLD on and off for 4 years and I have never seen a profile where a woman asked for financial help. Also, what does loss of marriage gain of home look like? Is it possible you are projecting?

Most were graduate degrees, most wanted/needed boats and were pictured with them. Most were sports heavy game watches.

So I have OLD on and off for 4 years and I have never seen a profile where a woman asks for or says she needs a boat. As for having graduate degrees and watching sports, that does sound horrible. (insert LH eyeroll) lol.

No way, sorry.. Not buying into it.

Mach I think you are still hurting and shouldn't be on these sites.

I have deleted accounts. I bad two meets from one app. Just casualno follow ups.
I think I was profiling people off of pics etc. Used to be a recruiter USN, and I think I profile people.

[Mach40]

So I have OLD on and off for 4 years and I have never seen a profile where a woman asked for financial help. Also, what does loss of marriage gain of home look like? Is it possible you are projecting?.

I guess what I am seeing is patterns of people profiles.
When you get divorced, you either lose or gain a house, as well as your lifestyle.
Is that not correct?
And when they project via pictures a specific lifestyle, of which was there previous prior to divorce, they are wanting someone to help maintain it. Is that not true, or is that only what I see.

[Ginger1]

I shockingly enough haven’t had a difficult time at all finding men who are fit and active and also enjoy some good food and drink and aren’t obese. That part has been pretty easy. And I don’t have a height requirement . So that’s easy. I don’t have a 6-6-6 requirement.


Finding men who aren’t still married or just divorced living there “I’m finally free!” Lifestyle has been my issue. I’m in a very different place in my life than most men my age. This is the first guy who has matched me where he is at in his life with age of kids, time divorced, and what he is looking for and matching effort so far. That has been what has ruled so many men out for me.

Only one alcoholic so far. So that’s good .

[LH19]

[

This is the first guy who has matched me where he is at in his life with age of kids, time divorced, and what he is looking for and matching effort so far.

Wow 1 guy in 12 years who fits what you are looking for in a guy. Guess this is why so many men are frustrated with OLDing.

[LH19]

And when they project via pictures a specific lifestyle, of which was there previous prior to divorce, they are wanting someone to help maintain it. Is that not true, or is that only what I see.

Or they just want you to be a part of it.

[DnJ]

Please start a new thread.

[Ginger1]

[

This is the first guy who has matched me where he is at in his life with age of kids, time divorced, and what he is looking for and matching effort so far.

Wow 1 guy in 12 years who fits what you are looking for in a guy. Guess this is why so many men are frustrated with OLDing.

This isn’t only OLD. And yes, it has been especially hard for me. Imagine being 28 divorced with a 6 months old. An age where people are just getting married. I have always been at a very different stage in life as my peers. It doesn’t have to do with the superficial stuff. The single Guys didn’t want to date divorced women with babies at 30. They were either getting married themselves, or single and looking, but not looking for a woman who has a baby /toddler/ preschooler and a custody schedule of free one night a week and every other weekend ( and for the first 3 years of that, I had to work those nights when she went to her dads)

Then there is the period everyone is married having kids and I’m still over here living the single mom life. Then I enter the stage where I have been divorced for years, and then guys are JUST getting divorced.

This isn’t superficial stuff. This is gross incompatibility. And it has been a really struggle for me. This is what has whittled my population down to like 4% of men. I’m the one who isn’t being chosen over here. I can’t blame these men either . Just like guys didn’t want to date a 30 year old with a small child, I don’t want to date 40 year old recently divorced men who are “seeing what’s out there” or have really little kids.

It’s not because a guy isn’t 6 feet tall or doesn’t make 6 figures.

Dating is HARD. When you date before marriage and kids, everyone is basically on the same page. Not this late I’m life.

[BL42]

Ginger1,

Imagine being 28 divorced with a 6 months old.

I have always been at a very different stage in life as my peers.

I hear ya...imagine being 38 divorced with a D1 (and S4). Though granted I'm much newer to it.

The single guys didn’t want to date divorced women with babies at 30....not looking for a woman who has a baby /toddler/ preschooler and a custody schedule

I don't know. OM2 didn't seem to have much of a problem moving in with W, S4, & D1. Just a little humor...too soon? :-/

Dating is HARD. When you date before marriage and kids, everyone is basically on the same page. Not this late I’m life.

Agreed. And stage of life (age, kids...etc.) is a huge factor which gets more complicated as time goes on.

[Ginger1]

You do also realize it’s frustrating for women too, right ?

You shouldn’t be frustrated though. You found your match. You were able to look past her 2 baby daddies and that her own child hasn’t spoken to her years. She treats you like a king and she’s amazing and you are compatible. So it’s all good for you as a man.