Thank you R2C, I dug around the threads you provided. Some major wisdom in those. I am curious on everyone’s thoughts around exposing what is going on, or contacting the OM. There is nobody besides myself that knows what is really going on. I am starting to feel like I cannot have her in my house any longer. I mentioned last night the OM she is talking to is in recovery for H addiction, he only has 9 months. I am all about recovery, but do not feel comfortable with this relationship in my or my children’s lives. I did great on my NC today, and did not pull any records throughout the day, until right before bed. She texted him all day long again, hundreds of messages. I feel like continuing to detach and act like nothing is wrong is not the right way to do it. Am I not thinking right? Do I just let it be? Either way I am going to continue my path, but would like to get everyone’s thoughts. I feel like I need to confront her.
I did pull a script that puppydogtails used and tweaked it to my situation. I also really liked the boundaries he set. I put all below.
I will no longer tolerate your deceit. I will no longer stand idly by while you have an affair with a man in early recovery, and then not only LIE to your parents and our children about it, but tell our children, your family and anyone who listens how terrible I am. That you need to get out of the house to protect your sobriety. Well, that's over. You either tell them the truth, or I will, and I will show them the evidence that I have. You have exactly 5 minutes to decide.
-- no calling or texting OM from inside of our marital home;
-- no calling or texting OM in front of our kids, regardless of where you are
