Good Morning DW

Originally Posted by DW17
I was trying to read 3 books at once which was a dumb plan.

So the stories get a bit mixed up. Lol. The orcs left Rivendell and attacks the Death Star while Neo consulted Gandalf about the future of the matrix-shire. And agent Vader-Smith found some kind of ring or something or other. smile

Originally Posted by DW17
The biggest change the past few weeks has been my reactions to her behavior. I’m not sure if I don’t care anymore or what, but I feel indifferent to her even being in the house. Our 18th anniversary was yesterday and I didn’t even really care. I actually forgot about it until the afternoon. W didn’t mention it until the evening when she jokingly asked if I was going to buy her flowers and I just said no and continued with what I was doing. It’s weird. Reflecting on things now, it’s kind of sad. I’m not sure if my feelings are a good thing or a bad thing, but things just seem more peaceful when W isn’t around. Much different from a few months ago when I couldn’t even sleep when she was gone. Is this how detachment feels, or am I starting to give up? I'm not sure.

Sounds like indifference.

Detachment is not being uncontrollable dragged around by your emotions. Indifference is feeling muted emotions or numb to the situation.

Other feelings will appear and loom large against the void of indifference. Give yourself time to acclimatize to it. Lots of temptations during this time. Avoid making major life decisions based upon emotions or lack thereof.

Indifference is temporary. Like all emotions it is fleeting, and does unwind. Feelings do return. This temporary stage is an excellent opportunity to discover yourself without the noise and distractions of W and the situation.

When you exit indifference, especially after doing some inner work, you will find detachment still remains. As well as the peace it provides.

I suspect it seems rather strange losing your feelings towards W. It’s perfectly normal. And temporary. And part of the path towards acceptance.

Take care, remain kind and compassionate, and have a Merry Christmas.

D


Feelings are fleeting.
Be better, not bitter.
Love the person, forgive the sin.