Funny you should ask. Your last post really got me thinking. I just ran out to get lunch. I was thinking about it while driving. I think maybe I feel hopeless because I am being self centered and only thinking about me. Being the victim, which I despise. Not even fully aware that I'm doing it. I read all these other stories and most of them don't have the fairy tale happy ending. So I'm just having a pity party in my head for poor me. My W told me something a while back when I mentioned her unwillingness to "try" to work on things. She said everyday she wakes up and is still at home, with me feels like a win. She sees that as trying. At the time, I didn't say it to her, I thought that was a bs answer. So yes, I have more growing to do. These infrequent moments of clarity are nice. I wish there were more of them.
Originally Posted by DonH
I think she’s being honest about that. It’s where she’s at and you wanting more is nothing but pressure to her. She feels like you’ve got her cornered right outside your goal. She’s trying to get past you to just get a little downfield towards your goal but you keep pushing her back. Give her a little room to work. Stop the full court press and just let her get to center court where the game can actually be played. You’re so focused on scoring you’ve lost site that in this instance if you shoot and score it means you actually lose the game rather than win it.
Great analogy Don.....
Mike...
What would it look like to you to let her get to half court ?
What does it look like to trust yourself enough to do that ??
What is stopping you from giving her time to work on her, while you work on you ??
