I haven't grown as much as I need too. I have changed. For the better. My biggest problem isn't growth or change though, in my opinion. I struggle with feeling hopeless. A lot. I feel like I'm on this rollercoaster that everyone talks about and when it ends, I will be standing there alone. Thanks for the hard questions. I haven't really put that amount of effort into thinking before now.
I really liked your answers, and I will prolly come back to them after I "hear" them....
I just wanted to ask this....
Why would you say, that you feel hopeless ?
Funny you should ask. Your last post really got me thinking. I just ran out to get lunch. I was thinking about it while driving. I think maybe I feel hopeless because I am being self centered and only thinking about me. Being the victim, which I despise. Not even fully aware that I'm doing it. I read all these other stories and most of them don't have the fairy tale happy ending. So I'm just having a pity party in my head for poor me. My W told me something a while back when I mentioned her unwillingness to "try" to work on things. She said everyday she wakes up and is still at home, with me feels like a win. She sees that as trying. At the time, I didn't say it to her, I thought that was a bs answer. So yes, I have more growing to do. These infrequent moments of clarity are nice. I wish there were more of them.
