Thanks Mach. I’ve learned in life to take situations and news that might make me feel bad and put them aside so I can go on and enjoy life and have fun. Not much has taken me “out” I’m one of those high functioning you would never even know I was having the feelings I am having types of people. Is it healthy? I dunno. That’s why I mentioned on B’s post that I allow my daughter to see me sad and vulnerable. I don’t want her to have to think she should be going through life strong as a rock and her mom has no feelings.
Don- thanks. I’m not heartbroken. But I am sad. Truth is, he doesn’t have this stuff figured out. How to even make the casual thing work. And I realized yesterday he’s a “Mr. Nice guy” he said he hates upsetting people….. but he doesn’t realize by trying to not upsetting people, he upsets people, lol. This one is harder because he isn’t a malicious person. I don’t even think he realized he was “using” me. And when I pointed out how his actions made me feel that way, he seemed genuinely unaware, and was like “wow, I’m sorry” and no, he doesn’t want to let go totally, but I have to. I was feeling pathetic, quite honestly. And I told him as much. And I can’t be around anyone who would cause me to feel that way about myself.
I had fun at my party last night. I got a lot of compliments on my weight loss. Everyone said I look “skinny” ( skinny and me don’t belong in the same sentence, lol). I actually think I looked hot last night. It WAS difficult when nearly everyone asked me if I had a man in my life. The timing do the question stunk, and like usual, the answer is “nope”
I’m not closed off to dating, but I will not enter the online world again for a long long time. I can’t begin to tell you how much worse it is now than even 2 years ago. COVID changed the landscape of how people act behind a screen. It’s nauseating. So if I meet a guy out there on the wil who isn’t married , I’ll see. But for now, it’s me, the kid, the dog , the friends, the job
