I wish I could have been a fly on the wall on that MC meeting my W went to alone that I declined.
She hasn’t said a peep to me since she’s got back.
What purpose would that serve?
It’s highly likely that even if you knew exactly what was said, the answer to save your marriage wouldn’t be there. It’s not like she would have said “If only he did xyz I’d be with him” and then you could go do xyz and live happily ever after.
It just doesn’t work that way 🤷♂️
And chances are, if you did xyz, she would say “he’s only doing xyz because he thinks I want to hear it.” Or “it’s too late now”. Or “what I really need is xyz plus abc.” There is no quick solution or lightbulb moment to get a WAS/WS re-engage. They will continue to move the goalposts.
Being there or not being there, thinking about what she said or didn’t say, what the counsellor said or didn’t say, and why she’s gone quiet since the appointment - all you’re doing is pissing in the wind. Get a life activities for YOU should be your highest priority. Let her simmer on the stove.
She’s on a path and she has to walk it on her own. Nothing you hear, know, see, say or do is likely to change anything (other than to push her further away).
You need to continue to seek detachment. I think if I was a fly on the wall at my Ex’s therapy or counselling sessions, the thing I’d be most interested in would be the colour and texture of the paint I was standing on 🤣
