Like Steve said, the correct response to her going berserk about your family going to the pool - validate but don’t change.
Best response “Sounds like you’re upset.”
And then that’s it. Zip it. You’ve validated that she is being an irrational whack job and she feels heard, but ain’t your job to do anything about it.
Don’t add “I’ll think about it” or “perhaps I can change xyz”.
Forget trying to do anything, because to her right now, anything you try to do/say/fix/change is a waste of time.
Just reflect her own feelings back at her and then get on with your life. Her - I’m angry. You - Sounds like you’re angry. End of discussion.
Stop trying to fix things, that’s nice guy syndrome.
And if you don’t want to go out with her Friday, tell her you’ve made other plans. You seem afraid of how she might respond? You’re a grown ass man!
