I am so sorry about your co-workers' son. My condolences to the family. It just seems like people have no respect for human life these days and it's easier to rob someone than get a job and get paid.

I think you are doing the right thing by ending it with the hockey player.

Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to.
The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.