Wolfman Moving Forward 5

[BL42]

Wolfman,

Gf created such a stink about me not having my son 2 days before Thanksgiving. Using the excuse that we need to clean the house and he shouldn't come over for those 2 days (Tuesday & Wednesday). I explained to her I was not foregoing those days just to clean the house.

Good for you for sticking up to your GF about your relationship with your son. That is a non-negotiable.

Guess what happened? We went food shopping with my s and it was fine. No issues at all. We cleaned the entire home after my son would leave at night and go to his moms. Everything got done, had a great Thanksgiving. All of that arguing and fighting was over nothing.

Glad you had a positive result. Often times when we stand up for what's right even when there's fear of the response it's less pushback than initially feared.

If she would just listen to me sometimes and trust we can get things done if we work together.

"If she would just listen to me ..." is a concerning way to phrase it. Make sure you're not coming off patronizing in your regular interactions.

Then this morning she sends me a link to read about post partum and how the man needs to be patient and understanding. If she feels she is post partum then she should go and get that checked out.

Perhaps her sending you that link is a cry for help. Perhaps it would be worth raising the issue of your concern for her health and wellbeing in your couple's counseling and offer to go with her to the doctor just to rule out the possibility that she's still in post partum.

I agree w/bttrfly. Are you supporting her in this? Instead of putting it all on her, could you help out in some way?

I never know what person i am getting. It is mentally exhausting.

I can imagine.

It’s not something you have to answer today but is this the way you want to live the rest of your life? Or even the next 5 years? What about the next 5 months?

Good question to ponder by DonH. You have a limited sample size, but it hasn't been great. Think you need to keep DB'ing and see if things improve over time, especially because of the young child, but be wary...