Hey buddy, sorry you had a rough time with that....
Some things you just have to power through with dignity, honor , and grace....
I remember that hurt, feeling like I was an outcast in my children's lives because I felt that someone new was taking my place.
In time, it will fade. I always felt that their time with their Mother was party time, and I was the one that had to be the "asshat" because there was structure, and discipline with me. I was wasn't all Disney and fairytails..
I will tell you this, and I hope it helps...
Whatever you think that it is, it really isn't...
All the fun, and smiles, and you feeling replaceable....
It isn't real...
Your kiddos hurt not being with you the same as you hurt, and in time that will eventually reveal itself.
But is also doesn't mean that those times have to be hard. It's totally normal to miss them, and I would venture-being the kind of guy I read here- that you didn't miss them any less than you normally do during drop offs....there was just a visual reminder of what has happened.
Holidays, anniversaries, and birthdays are just normal days that we place expectations, memories, and traditions on...
How was your drop-off any different in reality compared to any other drop-off, other than the nostalgic feeling of the day ?
Probably not much...just the visual stuff with seeing him.
Try to maybe think along these lines....
They are happy when they are with her also, and they are a part of her also.....
Even though it ended, she is the reason that you have them, and find the thankfulness in that. ( and I think that you do)....
If you've been reading along on my thread, the discussions I've been having with my Son have really shown things in a new light. All of the things that I "thought" were happening, in reality, were not happening.....
I felt as though Dr Giggles was this strong presence in their lives, which in fact, he really hasn't been.
He told me that he merely tolerates him, and he is quite the pompous ass when he isn't being told exactly what to do by my Ex.....and that his Sister feels the same way. He is a by-product of being around their Mother....
Yet, I am Dad....and nothing takes priority over that....
So don't believe the lies that your mind tells you, it will eventually be different than what you think that it is....
You are rockin this schidt buddy.... just be you, and just be Dad....they know....
