Taz:

Thank you for that.

While I still have my senses up to the possibility of an EA or PA, but through my verification I haven't found evidence of this so far.

When I think back about the timeline and went through old texts between us:

July - Starts reading a ton. Finished 10 books in the month. I don't really think anything of it.

August - I actually get her a kindle for her birthday because she was spending a ton of money on physical books.

At this same moment, I also expressed to her that I wanted to work on more intimacy, etc. (wanting us to have more sex). She then very casually says she "...had also been thinking about that part of our relationship...affection in general and wanting to work more on our relationship with communication, intimacy, parenting, being more of a team. At this same time, she again very subtlety says "...I also have some body image stuff to work through and I have some built up resentment that I've never want to deal with or communicate". She also says "...it's easier for her to go through the motions, ignore, and push me away and admits that is not right".

So at this time, since it was literally the first time I heard this, I didn't think THAT much about it because I didn't understand the severity of what she was saying. At that time, I didn't really even understand resentment and how dangerous it is to a relationship. I figured it was just something we would both just work on.

Through the month of August we had some good times. I remember we got a weekend alone without our daughter for a really nice date night, intimacy, etc. and also a really nice getaway family weekend trip.

September - Starts being really strict about her diet. Sometime this month she gets a personal massager and didn't tell me she did. Towards the end of the month is when the blow up happened and I think the blow up came out quite unplanned. It just came to a head that particular night. It wasn't a calculated, pre-planned thing on how she was going to tell me all this stuff regarding the deep resentment, etc.

End of September/October through now has been me really trying to fix things when I found out the severity of the situation and the fact she didn't know if she wanted to be with me anymore. Which if you've read my previous posts, obviously hasn't worked at all and how I got here and how I'm changing my strategy and moving forward.