What to do?

[MikeP]

I completely agree that you should not be taking any action immediately on any one persons advise here. You gather as much information on the subject at hand, process it and then make a decision on how you will respond.

As for this:

“That’s not working for me” in regards to continuing on like we have been ?

This is intentionally vague words to her. She will then start running though all kinds of things trying to figure out what you mean. You have her thinking about you as your are walking away.

I told myself last night to stop with the R talks of she’ll never come around, I’m determined to stop the talks.

We all fall off the horse. Get back on, continue with the light talk, etc, but avoid the R talks at all costs. If they start, STFU and listen. Most guys suck at listening to women. They want you to understand how they emotionally felt. You can't take it personally. Listen with empathy. Keep all your needs to yourself. Have the mindset of "thanks for sharing, I know her better now."

I completely agree that you should not be taking any action immediately on any one persons advise here. You gather as much information on the subject at hand, process it and then make a decision on how you will respond.

As for this:

“That’s not working for me” in regards to continuing on like we have been ?

This is intentionally vague words to her. She will then start running though all kinds of things trying to figure out what you mean. You have her thinking about you as your are walking away.

I told myself last night to stop with the R talks of she’ll never come around, I’m determined to stop the talks.

We all fall off the horse. Get back on, continue with the light talk, etc, but avoid the R talks at all costs. If they start, STFU and listen. Most guys suck at listening to women. They want you to understand how they emotionally felt. You can't take it personally. Listen with empathy. Keep all your needs to yourself. Have the mindset of "thanks for sharing, I know her better now."

You don’t have to worry about me listening to her, she NEVER tells me anything. Ever. That’s a lot of the problem with our marriage pre affair. Didn’t nag or complain, basically nothing. Hasn’t changed now either.