Honestly, T, I don't know the answer to your question. I would say, at this age (he's a few years younger than me, can't remember exactly how many, he's maybe 60-62 now?) that the likelihood of change for HIM is small. I mean, he lived with exactly one woman in his life many years ago and that ended fairly quickly and very badly, with someone throwing the other person's stuff off a balcony.
On the other hand, because I had just come out of dating two confusing Love Avoidant guys in a row, and had finally learned about Love Avoidants, I took him at his word when he said in the beginning that he didn't DO relationships, so I never pursued him or tried to change that. I still think that was the right choice, but honestly, hearing that the Love Avoidant guy that I dated just before I met Spa Guy actually got married a few months ago made me reflect on my dating history throughout my life. It may be true that I give up too easily on guys who might come around if given a little more time. It's also possible that that is just healthy boundaries on my part.
Anyway - since I don't feel up to the whole dating process with someone new anytime soon, I will go visit Spa Guy next month. He's a sexy friend who is clearly quite fond of me, but not likely to have changed his stance on monogamy or relationships. I'm okay with accepting him as he is. And if he wants to change anything about that, he will have time to make himself clear, as I won't be jumping back into the dating pool anytime soon.
