Action 2

[BL42]

How are you doing Rockon? Did she return into town yesterday? Anything come of that?

[Rockon]

I’m exhausted and happy. I was stressed through the weekend with the unknown but gathered some great support around me and was doing better by Sunday afternoon.

W got home to her mom’s from the trip without incident I understand. I was glad she was safe.I understand she was able to connect with a couple of our kids and grandkid on her return so that’s cool.

I’m making sense of it all. Apparent to me is she does not want to be married. So time and space LRT . Time for me to keep moving on.

Going to bed now. I’ll be ok.

[LH19]

What does LRT mean to you?

[Rockon]

Move on don’t pursue or pressure love my life the way I need to.

[BL42]

So she didn't reach out to you after returning? Don't reach out at all...no texts, no emails, no calls...etc. Stay strong Rockon.

[Rockon]

She started texting me around 48 hrs before her flight home. (She had also reached out to me from time to time during the trip)

I was slow, friendly, brief and measured in my responses. She asked me about our special needs son we had conversations about him and his treatment plan. She asked me about my life and our family and I provided updates.

After she got home she has started started reaching out more to me now.

She started to talk about future plans with me and I listened and said I was open to considering and that I am really enjoying life now and have to consider what’s best for me at first she wasn’t telling me anything about her trip but then started to talk about it I listened. She went to 3 countries met up with friends that she had made when she had done a previous journey. Talked about sites she saw walks she went on etc. She did not mention OM at all.

So pretty decent conversations. I’m still processing a lot.

[Rockon]

Does not mean that I think she didn’t meet OM just that she chose not to talk about it.

[BL42]

Rockon,

W got home to her mom’s from the trip without incident I understand.

I understand she was able to connect with a couple of our kids and grandkid on her return so that’s cool.

When you used the term "...I understand" it sounded to me like you heard from a third party and not directly from her, which is a lot different than this...

She started texting me around 48 hrs before her flight home. (She had also reached out to me from time to time during the trip)

After she got home she has started started reaching out more to me now.

Sounds like she's actually reaching out to you quite a bit.

I was slow, friendly, brief and measured in my responses.

She started to talk about future plans with me and I listened and said I was open to considering and that I am really enjoying life now and have to consider what’s best for me at first she wasn’t telling me anything about her trip but then started to talk about it I listened.

It also sounds like you're lending her a whole lot of emotional support, and showing her you're still open to things despite her actions, and being there for her...

Do you think that's smart?

She went to 3 countries met up with friends that she had made when she had done a previous journey. Talked about sites she saw walks she went on etc. She did not mention OM at all.

I can't imagine she would mention OM. Kind of a convenient omission, isn't it? Most WSs around here will flat out lie about their AP to their spouses face. Mine did. Doesn't mean she wasn't involved with him.

So pretty decent conversations. I’m still processing a lot.

Actions > words. What do you think those conversations are accomplishing?

Rockon - You're still being soft...trying to nice her back, being there for her, supporting her emotionally. Just my humble opinion, but I think you're making it easier on her and you really need to get stronger, grow a pair, and remove any notion in her mind you're going to be the nice caring supportive husband in the future with her jetting off to see OM. It's your sitch, not mine, but that's my $0.02.

[LH19]

She started to talk about future plans with me and I listened and said I was open to considering and that I am really enjoying life now and have to consider what’s best for me at first she wasn’t telling me anything about her trip but then started to talk about it I listened. She went to 3 countries met up with friends that she had made when she had done a previous journey. Talked about sites she saw walks she went on etc.

So once you engage you lose. Your stance on any kind of recon should be "It's not that easy any more".

She did not mention OM at all.

Did you think she would give you details of her sex trip?

So pretty decent conversations.

What was so decent about the conversations? Because she discussed the future and didn't talk about OM?

[Rockon]

Because I held my ground and am moving on. And I’m thankful she is safe and connecting with our kids.