Its good to hear from people here that have succeded in moving forward. My ex seems to have.
Mach your ex has moved forward because she probably started about 3-5 years ago and has never looked back. You haven't moved forward because you haven't tried yet. Her dating I think is finally made it real to you that she has moved on.
Originally Posted by Mach40
My only issue , problem, is I have no person to talk to here, as my life revolved around work, and what family I did have. No real friends at all. Cant talk to BIL either.
Have you looked into meet-up groups?
I have not looked into meet up groups. When I get back from AK, i am going to Church, non denominational. Just to get some spiritual guidance. My ex is a super planner. She has been planning and executing her departure and move on for easily 5 years. She also didnt persue divorce as it would have hindered the kids lives. I think she stayed on for youngest to get into college, and oldest needed help after grand baby was born. Stayed for the kids, even though in separate homes.
I think some social engagement would really help. I get the sense you're alone quite a bit - travel around a lot for work and stay at home on your own when not.
What activities interest you? You mentioned hiking...maybe there's a local group to do that? If memory serves you took a cooking class with your daughter? Hiking, sports, art classes, cooking classes, volunteer activities...etc. Imo you need to figure out what you really like and get involved in an activity in that area and meet folks who share similar interests.
Me:39 Ex-W:37 M:7 T: 9 S:6 D:3 BD/IHS/Confirm EA/PA: Feb '20 OM1 affair ends: May '20 W/OM2 & moves out: June-July '20 W files for D: Jul20 OM2 confirmed: 9/2020 Divorced: May '21
I’ll readily admit that this comment comes from a place of not being overly familiar with your story, but why bother texting at all? She knows it is her birthday, she has people to love and support her, she “fired” you from that position, so not sure why you would. Like I said I’m not super familiar with your situation as I’ve not had the time to go back and read it all but I would think you’d be better served to just let it go. Just one very uninformed person’s opinion…….
Me 52, H53 Bomb drop 9/29/2014 Divorce from XH final 12/17/2014 Marriage #2 12/31/2019 5 adult (step)daughters (3 from XH's first marriage, 2 from current H's previous relationships) 6 grandkids
Mach I hate to see you struggling with this dilemma. I guess you should ask yourself what people in life do you wish happy birthday to? What does those people mean to you? Does your exw fit into that category?
LH19, I know if I text her Happy B Day, she will be happy. Not texting her will make her sad.. I am not a mean guy, I love the kids and grands.. Little things add up over time, yet here I am worried about wishing her a happy B Day while she is still at work... according to Daughter . Daughter and I just got back from dinner. What does she mean to me? I havent let her go, yet, thnx to everyone here I am getting "it" more and more each day. I need to just let it go. Isnt easy.. Its like PTSD, little things ( Her Bday we have celebrated for over 30 plus years )trigger into bigger things..
