1) You started dating when you were still married and then quickly got her pregnant, so you really didn't have time to vet her and determine whether she's a good fit for you and whether she's a long term girlfriend/wife material. It's unlikely anyone still married or fresh out of a breakup/divorce finds their lifelong dream partner in the first encounter, and therefore likely right out of the gate you're going to have compatibility issues and not be a great fit. However, as you and others have pointed out...that ship has sailed. As they say in Economics, it's a sunk cost. So no point in dwelling there - it is what it is. All you can do is best address your situation as it stands.
So...
2) As others have mentioned, your posts come across as you pursuing a transactional relationship (I.e., returning her jacket and taking her to dinner = physical affection in return). Maybe that's not the case in real life - I know you've been struggling wanting more physical affection for awhile - but that's how it comes across to us. Now, this is the mother of your child. Ideally you'd want it to work out and not have a second baby momma Ex, so I'd recommend really focusing on your contributions. Even if you're not religious that quote from the Bible "Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful" is apt here. Think of your contributions and your love as totally selfless. And, as LH mentions, focus it not on a single day or week, but for a long period of time...6 months. Really try over a long period of time to be totally selfless and address her needs and wants. If you're patient and selfless and demonstrate your love over a long period of time, you very well might find her attitude and attraction to you changing for the better. And as LH mentions, if her outlook never changes over that long period of time, and your needs are never going to be met, then you'll have to decide to pull the plug.
Me:39 Ex-W:37 M:7 T: 9 S:6 D:3 BD/IHS/Confirm EA/PA: Feb '20 OM1 affair ends: May '20 W/OM2 & moves out: June-July '20 W files for D: Jul20 OM2 confirmed: 9/2020 Divorced: May '21