I was and still am hoping someone can fill me in on what happens in Late Withdrawal.
I am not here to talk about myself. I have a great support group for that and they are doing a great job. I leveled up in my life since then and am moving to level up AGAIN. Moving forward.
All I am asking is for someone to help me understand what he is going through.
IF NO ONE HERE CAN EXPLAIN Withdrawal and LATE STAGE WITHDRAWAL, then maybe someone can say, we don't know specifics about what they are going through. We only talk about ourselves, because that is what I am getting.
Focus on you. Do you. Let's talk about you.
If you guys do not know, maybe someone can say that and I will be oh, ok. Thanks.
We ask people to focus on themselves rather than the MLCr for a number of reasons, not the least of which being that often when the MLCr notices that their spouse is focused elsewhere they get a little bit of a shake up from their self-absorption and it can sometimes move them forward a bit.
MLC is the worst of the worst, imho. Every MLCr's timetable and process is different and there's no guarantee that the MLCr will ever complete the process and come out of the tunnel on the other side.
Also this is not a linear process. They often take one step forward and many steps back. We ask people to focus on themselves because it's a lot less painful for the LBS than trying to ride the bucking bronco of MLC.
Some helpful reading: * The MLC chapter in Divorce Remedy (MWD's book)
Anything by Amy C (former MLCr) Anything from Sandi
Question: What indications has your husband shown that he is in late withdrawal? Knowing some behavioral examples might prompt more responses.
I do caution against trying to mind read to try to figure them out. Often an MLCr has no idea why they're doing what they're doing. My exh admitted to that on more than one occasion. Hope this helps you.
Last edited by bttrfly; 09/22/2207:59 PM.
M 20+ T25+ S ~15.5 (BD) BD 4/6/15 D 12/23/16
"Someone I loved once gave me A box full of darkness. It took me years to understand, That this too, was a gift." ~ Mary Oliver
