A small update as I think it is extremely important for people who are just confronted with this to have an open thread that shows the evolution of a partner with MLC and how destructive it can get. I can only conclude from my specific experience and that is that in my case there have been a lot of mixed messages where I have sincerely believed that he was on his way back only to have to realize he wasn't at all.
That ultimately the best advice is to let them go, of course when you are ready. I myself have heard this advice from many people on this forum but it still took 3 years to completely let go.
BUT I’M FINALLY THERE AND CLOSE TO BEING HEALED IN FULL
I've had a fantastic summer. Lots of fun with family and friends, had a wonderful trip to Scotland, moved to a fantastic house in the middle of the city, where I immediately felt welcomed by the neighbors and the whole community. I am back to the person I used to be, albeit with much more lessons learned, but also with an acquaintance that will benefit me for the rest of my life.
I will write little about EX-H. He has been good for a while but recently slipped back and is still lost in LALA land but I've learned to draw my boundaries perfectly when he once again expresses his displeasure and then brings out his loveliest self again. (oh yes, both sides are still there)
Since the beginning of September, the children have been seeing him every two weeks at a fixed time for about 2 hours. They don't want any more today. And I assist them where necessary.
I am also quietly opening myself up to a future potential relationship. I feel like I'm ready for it. Everything in its time, the right person will come my way, I am convinced of that.
Lots of love,
Eagle
Eagle, I'm happy to read this post from you. Great job! It's a marathon, not a sprint for sure.
xoxo
M 20+ T25+ S ~15.5 (BD) BD 4/6/15 D 12/23/16
"Someone I loved once gave me A box full of darkness. It took me years to understand, That this too, was a gift." ~ Mary Oliver
