I am doing my best to value and love myself the way I deserve. This is the biggest reason why I would not take my XH back. Even knowing this, it still stings to realize that I gave myself over so fully to this person and he just threw me away. It hurts. It’s hard. But I also realize I allowed him to treat me the way he did. I stayed even when I felt things had changed between us and after I saw who he truly was. Yes, I stayed because I married him and I took on being a parent to his boys. So I took that seriously, but I also stayed too long. I gave him a pass on behaviors that I did not like because I loved him. I did not maintain my boundaries or other acts of not accepting the way he was treating me. So, yes, I am sad and hurt on many levels. But I am doing my best to focus on how empowered I feel to be away from him. And soon I will start dating and looking for someone who deserves the person I am now.
El
Me 52, H 56 T10 M7, 2nd MR for both 2 Step Sons (19 and 21) BD: Fall 2020 D finalized: July 2022 XH Married AP soon after D day.
