Hi Don. Thanks. You pretty much nailed it. It just feels unfinished which stinks and going out on a high note stinks. It’s much easier when you end things because you don’t like eachother anymore, lol. He developed feelings and he knows he shouldn’t be in a relationship now. He is someone who likes to be in one and he does feel like he ended up in this short term not so good marriage because he went from his LTR to her. I really do give him props for making an effort to not let that happen again. He wants the slate to be clean first. It just stinks for me:
LH, I’m pretty sure you violated your rules in your current R. I won’t get into the details here for sake of your privacy. But what you say other women shouldn’t do, she does. And I saw him 4 times in 5 weeks. And if we went at some rule of pace “one date per week” what difference would that have made? Absolutely none. The outcome would have been the same. I don’t think the fact we had 2 date in the same week changed anything.
Moving fast to me is meeting friends and family and making the person a part of your life. Not a matter of how many dates you have in a week. And fortunately/unfortunately, I cannot just sit there for a few weeks and keep conversation to music hobbies, and how my day at work was. I need depth and conversation and that happens early on. Because there is nothing without it. And I’m super easy to talk to. So I do get to know and connect with people on a more personal level ( friends and dates) faster than most. And yes, that leads to a quicker, slightly deeper connection. That I cannot help. Nor do I want to change it . I would bang my head against a table if all we spoke about was hobbies and work for weeks.
Truth be told….. I haven’t really had feelings with or connected with anyone since M. And that ended 3 years ago nearly to the day. Many dates, a few weeks with some guys, but I felt dead inside with just about all them. And funny, many swung back around at some point. Even Texan . But the ones I didn’t want to swing back around. Actually, I can’t think of any I want to than this guy. But I’m it banking on it.
I do promise one rule I will never break again is dating separated men. Not good. The other day thing is most men my age on these apps are separated or very newly divorced. I’m a rarity who has been divorced for quite some time. I had one guy say he “ making up for lost time after 10 years of misery” because I like to bother these men a a bit I asked him to elaborate. Apparently he missed traveling and time with his friend. This equates to 10 years of misery which was basically being married and raising his kid. This is all I find in the dating pool. And I should probably refrain
