I’m sorry it didn’t go the way you planned. I know it hurts to open yourself up and go with the flow, and also have “hope” this could be the one. As hard as that is, how would you find the “one” if you don’t do that? Why do you feel you don’t want to date for a while? Love is vulnerability. It’s a risk. There is no way to avoid that, is there? I sort of wonder if you would be punishing yourself more by not dating for a while just because this time it didn’t work out. I know hurting [censored]…I just don’t want you to hurt more on top of that. Are you sure its not fear talking instead?
Of course, there are many healthy reasons to pause on dating as well. So please don’t take this as my saying that you shouldn’t do that. I am just asking these questions in the hope that you can understand your reasons and do what is best for yourself.
I also agree that it’s better to not remain friends, but let him know you would love to hear from him again if/when he is ready to date. This gives you space and you would not be wasting your energy on something that may never happen (and I’m sure it would be hard to have friend feelings after all this time). If he needs to work on some things for himself, it gives him that space as well. You never know, he may come around again after he is ready. It really just might be too soon for him, even if he feels strongly about you. You said yourself that he sees how awesome you are. You are not just wanting anyone…you want the right one…and the right one that loves you back the way you need to be loved. He’s out there. I’m sure of it.
Hugs to you…
El
Me 52, H 56 T10 M7, 2nd MR for both 2 Step Sons (19 and 21) BD: Fall 2020 D finalized: July 2022 XH Married AP soon after D day.
