Wolfman moving forward 3

[Wolfman]

Thank you LH. I am not good at all at this validation. The age gap definitely plays a role too.
LH you said she is wearing the pants. I agree. I don’t know how to get it back. When I try to be a dominant male it turns into an argument. She always wants to be in control. I even see it with the baby. If he doesn’t listen to her, because he is a baby she gets frustrated. She just expects everyone to do what she says and that’s it. Even with the baby, if I do something different than what she says, forget it. I’m starting g to believe this might not be the right relationship. I will still try and make it work for the sake of the baby. Eventually when I feel I tried everything I might have to walk away. LH - the other thing is the feelings. I am tired of feelings. How about logic, how about evaluate the situation and understand that it’s not that bad. If we disagree, yes it can hurt someone’s feelings but to throw the whole situation out of proportion because you are not happy in the moment is ridiculous.

2 other things I want to talk about. Just had another conversation with GF.

1 that really struck me. She said she wants to feel madly in love with me all the time, like she can’t live without me and she doesn’t feel like that all the time. Is it just me, or does ANY relationship feel like that all the time? That is something in fairy tales. Just like my ex they feel life is supposed to be perfect all the time, and when it’s not, it’s the most horrible thing in the world.

2. This one is concerning. She is saying things that my ex has said I have done. That is I am causing her anxiety. My ex said the same thing. I don’t know what to do. I feel unless I am skipping around and happy all the time I cause them anxiety. The minute I am not happy or joking around I get called grumpy. I don’t get it, am I not allowed to have feelings. WhAt, am I just supposed to listen to everything they say and do what they say, can’t have an opinion on anything. So, I feel like this is something I am supposed to fix but I think they are asking the impossible.
I am supposed to be happy all the time, do what they say, and always worry about their feelings.
I am beyond confused. I feel when 2 women are telling me the same thing, there is some validity to it, but I also feel what they want me to do is the impossible.