So, as I sit here, on the remnants of the front porch of this burned out mess.... : )
I am thinking of the rocking chair on the porch.
What that is, what that symbolizes....
The dream of the rocking chair....
Growing older, sitting in the rocking chair on the porch, graying ( or even more gray), holding hands as the sun sets, laughing at our youth, possibly holding a Grandchild....
I have often used the phrase that people get pi$$ed because their rocking chair was stolen off of their porch. It's a symbolism of their future being altered, and changed by Divorce, or in this case....death.
Through divorce, it certainly seems that the missing rocking chair was attributed to a theft. In my case now, the rocking chair is still there, it's just empty..
What does that mean to me now ??
I'm not sure just yet, and maybe I need to spend some time in one, and see what the wind whispers to me....
Today is a Monday, which means 8 weeks. Not that it matters much now, other than my strange, warped way of marking time. It's almost the reverse of how people mark the time with a newborn....
Oh, Cadet is 3,582 and a half weeks !! : )
Kind of the same, just marking the time I've spent away from her. I would assume that it is normal to think along those lines, maybe not.
I DO know that it isn't healthy to stay in that place. It should eventually become a celebration of another fire that I walked through. And a celebration of the life that we DID have together before this. However, not there yet....
I assume that this, like soooooo many other things are just another landmark on my way to my promise to K....
Find a way through this, and find happiness....and popcorn possibly....
