If ExW wanted separation/divorce I could not stop her, but I was not going to let her actions be an excuse for me to break my vows. It's not about positioning her to be the bad guy, yet getting the result you want; it's about standing up with integrity to do what was right for me and my kids and honoring the vow I made. We can't control what are spouse does - hence I'm divorced - but we can choose to act with integrity and do the right thing regardless.
So BL do you believe that no matter what a spouse does you need to honor your vows? Don't you think it might be better to honor your values? Is sharing your W with another man part of your values? If you married again will you have any boundaries?
I won't answer for BL but for me my vows and values are one in the same.
So in regards to your values do you have boundaries? Or is it death to we part no matter what?
Absolutely I do... Letting someone go is about boundaries...and can also be a very loving decision for both of you. You can do that AND honor your vows/values.
P.S. I haven't heard "till death do us part" in a long time. Most of the weddings I attend people write their own vows and do NOT recite what was given by the church.
M(f): 40 D'ed: 8/12
Show empathy when there's pain. Show grace when warranted. Kindness in the midst of anger. Faith in the face of fear.
