If one or both of you will not commit to working on it just delaying the inevitable with the move-out/separation. Personally I would want to be the one to decide to separation or D. That was my ExW's choice, not mine - I'm comfortable with my own decisions for my own integrity and morals.
Thanks for your reply, BL42. The above quote stood out to me the most. That's the thing - I may just be delaying the inevitable. There's a part of me that wonders if she'll have the balls to pull the trigger. OTOH, do I want to be treading water for eons rather than getting this show on the road and meeting a better partner at some point? Yes, I get that the site is Divorce busting. I'm just pondering likelihoods.
Did you mean you would not want to be the one deciding on separation? That sort of makes more sense, and is probably something I could live with. Let her be the bad guy who broke up the family.
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That's her problem. Seriously. She's having an affair and wants to rip apart your family. You shouldn't be concerned about making it easier for her because she doesn't have family in town. Just my opinion, and you can take it or leave it, but I would not leave the house. Your children know and are comfortable in that house. That's their home. Let your W find a new place and have them be "home" with you and "go visit mommy at her new place".
Yes, I appreciate that. The funny thing in all this is that if I close my eyes just hard enough, things seem almost normal. But I don't think I have the patience to "stand" for too long in an emotionally lacking marriage.
