Was it my son's responsibility to tell me his Dad was banging someone else? He knew 4/24/15. I found out two years ago this week.
He had zero responsibility in that $h!t$how.
The h3ll of it is, he also had no one to bring this information to, so he could get help processing it. His godfather, who certainly knew, did not check on him, did not help him, did not step up in any way, shape or form. No one helped him with this. He was alone and you know exactly what the end result of that was for my boy.
Do I think my son's godfather, who told me for over 20 years that I was family, should have told me the truth? Actually, no. The person who should have told me the truth was exh. The responsibility began and ended with the guy who stood at an altar 28 years ago (yesterday, actually) and exchanged vows with me before God and everyone else who was important to us.
Do I think his godfather should have stepped up for my son?
Absolutely. It's shameful to take that responsibility for a kid and not follow through. That's what I hold my ex-friend accountable for, not anything relating to me and exh and our divorce.
Someone (Ginger) needs to walk little G through this, but the marriage and fallout of betrayal here is not between Ginger, Little G, exh and AP/current wife.
and thinking about this further - it's not just his godfather who failed my son.
* Exh's best friend knew and didn't help my son at all. In fact, he instigated a lot of trash talking about me with exh in front of our son - to the point where a 15 and a half year old had to tell this piece of trash 55 year old to stop talking smack about his mother.
* ExMIL knew and so did her husband. Neither of these pillars of society stepped in to help my son process this.
So there's a whole lot of blame to go around here. And not one of those people owed me a d@mn thing. But his grandparents certainly owed my son a safe place to discuss his father's betrayal of our marriage vows. The fact that neither of them did is on them and speaks volumes to their characters or lack thereof.
I expect nothing less from my exMIL. Her husband, on the other hand, is a big disappointment.
Huge.
What's my lesson here, imho? No one will care for my kid the way I will. Not even my kid's father and especially not tangential relatives and friends.
M 20+ T25+ S ~15.5 (BD) BD 4/6/15 D 12/23/16
"Someone I loved once gave me A box full of darkness. It took me years to understand, That this too, was a gift." ~ Mary Oliver
