IHS is very difficult. My guess is physical separation is going bring you peace.
This is a new development on the boards over the past few years. We didn't always push for physical separation.
Sure it will give you peace.. but it also won't give your W a chance to see your hard earned changes.. nor will give her the experience to see the new you which is why she questions her emotions.
Detach Peter. Who cares what she thinks...You are doing the changes for you right? So don't worry about the outcome. You have no control on whether she believes your change. Only time and consistency are the best chances of that.
Validate her hesitation/frustration/anger especially if when you're actions are 180s for you and how you behaved pre-BD
Walk away from conversations where she spews venom.
Not always easy... but fairly simple.
M(f): 40 D'ed: 8/12
Show empathy when there's pain. Show grace when warranted. Kindness in the midst of anger. Faith in the face of fear.
