Yeah, I don't think he feels it was creepy or scummy because he's "honoring his emotions".
He sounds like a bona fide narcissist. My exH of 24 years wasn’t quite this bad but he was also a narcissist, so I recognize the signs. (Took my best friend pointing it out to me after he left, but then all the puzzle pieces fell into place.)
The real task for you is to untangle yourself from all that f-d up manipulation your H has planted in your brain. Step back and ask yourself why you didn’t just call up your in-laws yourself and announce your pregnancy?
I’ll tell you, one thing I learned from my last boyfriend, is that it’s nice to be with someone who puts as much into the relationship as I do. With my narcissist husband, he could be charming (this is how narcissists lure you in) but in the long run, you’re only valuable as long as you make THEM look good and cater to their needs.
Thank you. It's very clarifying hearing your opinions. I think it's really, really tough because overall the ex comes off as a really kind person, and in general he is - but he hasn't been kind to me.
I'm realizing more and more just how much he treated me so awful, and that anyone who is that great of a person doesn't treat someone like that. Nor do they say they don't want to be a father. I had a medical complication during pregnancy where it wasn't clear if I could hemorrhage/die or need an emergent hysterectomy during delivery, and he said "you're worried about not having future children and I don't even want this one". Not a kind thing to say when your life is on the line or future reproductive rights.
