My sitch is great thanks for asking. Because the divorce was stopped and I now got myself a beautiful, loving and understanding wife, there has been no need for me to run a thread. It's like the last 20 years were a bad nightmare and we have begun our M on the right foot. Looking back now, I was a terrible H and father and it's a wonder we survived that long.
Well that's all changed now because I made changing myself a fulltime job for 18 months. My W did not do one minute of counselling or read one book. At first, that upset me and then I figured out how to use my changes to change her. There's a book called "The Way Of The Superior Man" by David Deida. Don't know if you are ready for it as it is high level R philosophy but it does give some straight forward tips.
One of the things it talks about throughtout the book is your ability to give your gift. At first, I thought WTF is this and after a while it dawned on me what it means. It's basically how you give love in the most profound way you can. I have a drawn up a list of ways I do this and though my W doesn't know what I am doing or thinking, she is so drawn to it and it warms her heart, therefore sex is never a problem anymore.
When I feel that she takes me for granted and slips into her old behaviors, I simply remain happy, friendly and withdraw my gift. It doesn't take her very long to miss the extras', realizes her mistakes and comes around. Then we have make up sex. All without an anger and definately no love busters. So that's where I'm at.
Suit
"It's better to have no spouse than have a bad spouse"
