Wow, I'm sorry, COG, but I have no idea what to say. I do think it is far more difficult dealing with these issues while separated, so my heart goes out to you. I think you already realize that ultimately you and your W will each have to make your own choices, and that you cannot have much influence over the choices your W has made or will make. It looks to me like you have done a lot of really positive things, some of which have had some good effects, but it's hard to judge whether it's all been enough to save your M. Only you can answer that, and I think the answer is already within you. You just have to look deeply and listen closely to yourself to discover it. It's not likely to be an easy answer, unfortunately. Sorry I can't offer much in the way of input, but I have no experience with your type of sitch at all. I can say, however, that whatever happens, you are a survivor, and you will use it as a growth experience, and you will ultimately triumph...
