I feel for you. I'm in the same sitch as you. It's hard, really hard. From a cordial BD to hostile communication in under a month for me.

The vets here will say yes. In my case, it waxes and wanes based on her nervousness. As we led up to mediation for a parenting plan, the abuse was insane. When it finished, she backed off. When she received a letter from my L it remindes her that she probably won't get what she wants. Then the abuse flairs up.

All I can say is be the stronger person, the grey rock. Ignore the emails and texts that don't have value or are not kid related. Set boundaries, and walk away if they are violated.

What I found is that the longer it goes AND you are consistent, she will slowly back down.

Of course her actions are to hurt you. She knows you the best, and knows the most intimate ways to get to you.

For me, when she negotiated some free days, I jumped. I now love my weekends. Saturday no STMXW to interfere with child rearing, and Sunday I disappear. Sure, the first time I ignored her on my Sunday she chucked a fit. But after three she realises what this means.

Hang in there, you can do it! Look at the better future, this will just be a blip.


Me: 47 w/ S10, D12, D3
Current T: 12; M: 11 years; BD1: 11-11-18; BD2: 22-04-22; STBXW: 41
Previous M: 4 years; Big D: 2004; XW: 48