As mentioned before, I’ve been binge watching Asian rom coms and dramas for the last few weeks. Six months out from CMMs death, I’m really feeling his absence.
I think what is appealing to me about these shows is that they are filmed from the female gaze, and they usually dwell on the sweet little firsts in a relationship. The first time you hold hands, the first kiss, the first confession of love. It brings back lots of memories of those moments early in a relationship, when you’re feeling that first thrill of liking someone and them liking you back.
So I thought I’d put here, for the guys discussing dating over on LHs thread, the little things that make a woman’s heart go pitter pat when first dating (assuming she’s interested in you and vice versa). Asian rom com tropes:
- hand holding. I’m not talking about fondling a woman’s hand at the dinner table so much as the grabbing her hand while you’re walking along. I have fond memories of the long-distance guy I first dated after my divorce, the first weekend I went to visit him, showing me around his small tourist town. He held my hand as we walked around. I guess it made me feel - special? reciprocated? - that we were walking around his home turf, where EVERY body knew him, with him holding my hand. Nice.
- chilly girlfriend. Seriously guys, if it’s the least bit chilly, take advantage of the opportunity to take your coat or jacket off and put it over her shoulders. It’s like wearing a hug. Makes a woman feel cared for. And if she likes your pheromones, she’s smelling them on that jacket and thinking how good you smell. In my temperate clime there are fewer opportunities but I remember my first boyfriend when I was 15 giving me his plaid button down shirt to wear as a jacket one chilly night (he had a t-shirt underneath). It was a well worn cotton madras plaid shirt and smelled deliciously of his pheromones -I don’t think I ever gave it back.
- face touching. The scenes where a guy wipes something off a girl’s mouth, or an eyelash off her cheek, or pushes her hair back out of her eyes. Sweet.
- that first kiss. Maybe it’s just me, but the guy who put his hand behind my neck or head as he leans in to kiss me - that just gets me.
