Thank you for the honest and forthright responses. Very insightful. I am, as you point out, very pro--marriage. What I am anti is controlling, manipulative spouses. And I know one when I see it because I was one. My biggest 180 was to stop the controlling and manipulative behavior. However, that is not your 180 to make, it is your STBXH's 180 to make. You cannot make it for him or force him to make it. He has to arrive there on his own. And the only way he will arrive there is to truly feel like he is losing you. I say that because if you are having second thoughts, he probably senses that. WASs are incredibly intuitive in knowing what their LBS is thinking and feeling. That is why, though we often suggest to LBSs to "fake it until you make it", it usually isn't until you make it that the WAS is convinced that you are moving forward without them.
You've done a lot right here! No question about it. And I think you are in good shape to set yourself up for future R success. I think at your age and profession you are going to attract extremely high-value future partners if that is what you want. And I think once he feels you really are moving forward he will start to question what he is losing. Astrology and yoga only go so far!
So that was a long-winded way to agree with what R2C is saying. Move forward and he will either comes to his senses or he won't, but I do not think he will come to his senses until you do move forward.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
