Yeah, I'm doing well. I had a great GAL on the weekend, just went out myself and walked around the city, chatting with people, experiencing things I've never experienced before, and getting lots of exercise. It was a good way to get distracted since STBXW has been "suffering" since mediation by trying to pick fights and arguments. The more I read about covert narcissism, it makes so much sense. So I'm hoping her week of "injury" is coming to an end as her behavior subsides. I expected a lot of bad behaviour in and after mediation, so I was prepared. But still annoying to deal with, especially the gaslighting and history rewriting.
I'm meeting up with my FIL (or STBX-FIL) for whiskey/cigars/listening to good music. He demonstrates unconditional love, and I've discussed this earlier on about my grief at losing that relationship. He's non-judgemental so I know it can be a good time without any R talk.
My focus is kids, next round of mediation, and an upcoming trip to visit my family. I haven't seen my parents in person in 8 years, and D11/S8 will travel with me to visit them. I organised this pre-BD as I wanted my kids to have an R with their cousins, to rebuild my R with my parents and sister, as get some closure to my childhood. It will be very therapeutic.
In the meantime, STBXW if finding odd excuses to keep up conversations by SMS or email. ATM our RL conversations are purely kid related, which I really like. But the back channel conversations vacillate from outbursts, to mundane requests. I'm following the advice of not responding immediately unless I have a question.
We agreed in meditation to have weekly one on ones regarding kids, and I'm actually dreading this. It will take a lot of effort to make it work because it can easily turn into a forum for her to "negotiate" on her terms and potentially explode when things don't go well.
