Ruining a possible reconciliation, part 2

[BL42]

DBX80,

Good to hear an update.

Yes, she filed for divorce and everything was finalized last summer. Later this month will be our one-year anniversary of divorce.

Sorry it didn't work out. Sounds like we're on a similar timeline. My one-year D anniversary just hit. How are you feeling about everything? Making progress on the detachment / processing emotions?

And yes, she still brings cupcakes every so often, and still sends dog pics. I assume it’s her way of trying to be friends with me, but of course I’m not interested in that, so I don’t pay it much mind anymore.

Throw out the cupcakes and work on the physique! Lol Dog pics do seem odd - you see it most of the week.

One of our dogs passed away last year unexpectedly, and that was traumatizing for the both of us.

Sorry man. That's tough.

When I do see her, she always tries to chat me up, as if nothing happened and as if we’re the best of friends.

So bizarre.

Of course I’m cordial during these interactions, but it does create a bit of cognitive dissonance for me. So lately, I’ve been trying to avoid being present during the drop-offs and pick-ups. I don’t know if that’s healthy, or if it makes me look weak.

I think you do what's best for you. If you need to avoid those interactions, do it - don't worry about how it looks. Ideally you're out and about having fun naturally and it's not even an issue to ponder.

Sometimes she also texts me about random stuff that has nothing to do with the dog. For example, last week she texted me about a new tv show she was watching, telling me that I should watch it too because she thinks I would enjoy it. Again, she’s acting like nothing has happened and like we’re best friends. It’s disconcerting. I replied to her text merely saying, “Thanks.”

Again, so bizarre. At least to us LBSs. You'd think they'd know the hurt they caused and feel awkward about that. Maybe it goes to show how detached they were long before BD.

This summer, it will be 3 years since the bomb drop. I feel like if she was going to try and reconcile, it would have happened by now. Three years is a long time.

Who knows what the future holds. My BD is coming up on 2.5yrs. 3 years seemed like such a long time back then but it's flown by. As LH would say he knows people who reconciled after decades.

I’ve been going on dates, but nothing serious. I’ve discovered that dating nowadays is kind of a nightmare, and I don’t really look forward to it, to be honest. I don’t know how people do it. 😂

Yeah...I'm finding that as well so far, but it hasn't even been a year yet so we'll see...