Curtain Call

[SteveLW]

sls, glad to see you recognize that the lack of work is what resulted in BD#2. However, even though you want a D this time, you still need to follow the DBing principles. GAL, self-improvements, detachment. As the bald, Texan TV psychologist says: "Earn your way out of your marriage." This is an important step, because you still have to put the work in on yourself in order to be successful in a future relationship. And I'll even say in order to properly coparent with your STBX post-D.

So get into IC, work on you. Set yourself up for future success.

Also, one day your 11 year-old will probably ask "Why did you give up on the marriage?" Do you know what you are going to say? Can you look at her and honestly say that you did everything within your power to work on and save the marriage? Or will she see you as having jus tossed it aside without even considering the best interests of her or anyone else? This is a hard question that most divorced parents eventually have to face. That is why DBing is so important because those that put in the work can then tell their children completely honestly that they did all they could to work on the MR.

I agree with BL, hearing what went wrong recently would help us get a clearer picture of what is going on and what your 11 year-old may be wondering, and asking about in the future.