Look, the GRE is a big thing. And you WANT her to pursue an education and a career for the sake of your child and your own finances going forward, whether you stay together as a couple or not. So you did the right thing.
As for the future, you BOTH need better communication. You also NEED to find a reliable babysitter ASAP, as there will be other things that come up in the future where a sitter will be essential.
If you tend to forget things she tells you (although I can see how you assumed the test was at 8:00 am!) maybe you need to use a family calendar app so that everything is written down clearly and you don’t have to rely on faulty oral communication and faulty memories.
Also, I see two things she said that would be ideal for addressing in therapy:
First, her comment that she’s not getting enough help. Is that true? What is the division of labor in your home? It can be overwhelming and exhausting to care for a baby and run a home.
Second - and this is a lot harder to address - her mentality that she should be on a pedestal. A year into this unfortunate situation and she’s still clinging to a fairytale image of how life should be? I understand that she wanted to be in a relationship where you both were very much in love when she had this child - I think we all want that. And it’s unfortunate that wasn’t the case. But the word “pedestal” kinda sets me off. Think about it in reverse - what if YOU were demanding that a woman put YOU on a pedestal, bring you your pipe and slippers when you get home from work, objecting that she pays too much attention to her children from a previous marriage that her ex has primary custody of, etc. I think we all could agree that would be boorish behavior.
But some women were brought up as spoiled “princesses” and expect to be treated that way in a relationship without reciprocating. What was her family of origin like? What are her female friends like? Is there no family nearby that can help with the baby?
