So, if at night you are too tired and during the day you are too busy, when do I fit in? Im not looking for it everyday, but man once and a while would be nice. I want to ask you all. Am I asking for too much? Are my expectations too high?
Wolf, she's probably not attracted to you just now. Yes, it's too much to expect someone who's not attracted to you to have regular sex with you. Work on the long game of attraction.
Originally Posted by Wolfman
So, I am up at 4:30 am and go to the gym for an hour, then go to work. So by 9pm, i am exhausted. Thats usually the time we have our down time, so a lot of times we will start watching tv and i will fall asleep, and she gets annoyed with me, that is supposed to be our quality time together.
Wolf, problem solve. "Her love language is quality time, I get up at 4:30am to go to the gym, so I'm too tired to watch TV in bed at 9pm." A few ideas--(1) watch TV outside your bedroom. I've never as an adult had a TV in my bedroom. You'll be less sleepy if you're in the living room. (2) Get home gym equipment and/or videos and/or online fitness group, which saves time and costs less than going to the gym, (3) Sit in a chair next to the bed instead of laying in the bed.
I'll also ask--do you ENJOY watching TV with her? I don't watch TV with most of my GFs because I'm not a TV person, with few exceptions where our tastes 110% aligned. Hopefully, you are watching TV with her because vegging in front of the TV does something for you, and cuddling up with her gets you touch, so it's only the staying awake you're doing for her.
Originally Posted by Wolfman
So, I asked did you speak with a therapist? She hesitated and said yeah. I asked her why did she lie to me? What was the big deal. Her response was, I don't know with you.
Uhoh. She sounds afraid. Given this has been a pattern in your life if there's ANY merit to her fears, taking concrete actions to address whatever led to those fears should be your focus.
Originally Posted by Wolfman
But in my mind a little confused why she didn't try and get a relationship counselor.
You said it was "good", so don't undermine that by asking her to justify it.
