To be clear, I was in no way describing a personal experience, rather challenging this statement: "Having a therapist tell her that expecting him to put his kids from his first marriage behind her and her kid would have a lot more useful impact than him saying it, if she can hear it." The therapist's job is not to decide who is "correct" and then communicate that to the other party or get them to agree. Hence if an inability to communicate one's positions to the partner is the issue, then individual counseling is likely more helpful to learn effective techniques for doing so. The therapist who takes sides in a couple's conflict is acting more a judge than a counselor.
