tough times, I detect that you still have problems telling this woman "no". As Ginger said, there are not just a choice between two extremes. There is middle ground.
However, you have to learn to get her "no". When she asks you to visit the kids on your days, the answer is "no". The dropping off a child somewhere depends on the situation, but in general "no" because you're a busy guy out GAL.
Yes, even after BD1, where I stopped being MNG, I reverted. I do have a problem with saying no. It comes out of habit to please, and fear. As you can see, there can be powerful manipulation which I fall for.
I've decided to let her call the shots with mediation for now. I don't even know what topics she wants to bring up, she won't tell me. But since its a charity, I'm going to assume it's parenting plan. I can't see them having the capacity for mediation of settlement. Again, she hasn't even shown me numbers for settlement. I found a one stop separation service which includes balance sheet and legal advice. I'm pushing for that.
I know where I want to be with the parenting plan, so it's being strong about it.
Today, she wanted a GAL day, and I was happy for that. A whole day with the kids my way.
It's a roller coaster ride, every day is a different set of emotions.
